2 Years After Leaving Tech, Here’s What I’ve Learned

With one short-lived return in between.

"I'm switching from a career making $165k/year to $15/hr. Here's why..."

Began a post I shared on LinkedIn in March 2023. The post explained why I was preparing to trade spreadsheets for seed packets, equity grants for garden gloves, and a career path for something I couldn't yet see clearly (still working on this, tbh).

What surprised me wasn't the overwhelming support from my community but the flood of messages that followed. Past coworkers, friends, and strangers—many quite successful by ‘conventional’ standards—confessed:

"I've been wanting to make a change too."

Anonymized LinkedIn Messages.

That post resonated far beyond my network, revealing a quiet current of people asking how to reimagine their relationship with work.

This post is a look at how I’m navigating that question—and what I’m learning in the process, in case you’re asking something similar.

Seeds of Burnout: The Career Before the Change

In a 2022 post on the future of compensation, I wrote: "As Millennials shed their chrysalises held together by overwork, burnout, and an elementary drive to be seen as top performers, they are emerging with wings shaped by self-advocacy, realism, and refocused ambition."

In retrospect, I was projecting my imminent career crisis onto an entire generation. Sorry, fellow Millennials.

Starting in 2013, I’ve been lucky to do some cool work. I learned the ins and outs of remote work and pay transparency during the early days of Buffer. I led the charge in defining company values at Hipcamp. I built the People Ops function from scratch at Tuff. I consulted with dozens of startups on hiring and compensation.

In 2021, I joined Nextmv as Head of People. I had the autonomy to build creative approaches to People Ops, and the COO became a wonderful mentor. When burnout hit, I used product and mission as a scapegoat, not the underlying pattern.

So, I joined Elpha, supporting women in tech while working with an incredibly talented CEO. The work was varied, the mission was meaningful.

And yet, the burnout returned after the novelty wore off. Like clockwork.

Uncovering the Root Cause

Sitting in what I would later recognize as executive dysfunction, I was genuinely confused.

Why couldn't I enjoy this role I was passionate about? Why did something that used to feel so easy and natural now feel impossible?

At 30, I put a name to my ADHD.

Working with a therapist who specializes in neurodiversity, I began learning about my brain and the fast track I'd developed between hyperfixation and burnout (with a few pitstops at paralysis and guilt). My success in tech came from my ability to hyperfocus and drop everything else to keep up — a pattern that wasn't sustainable.

Transplanting My Career: Putting Down New Roots

I decided it was time to make a change that would get me out of my head and more into my body. I recognize the immense privilege of this choice and change. I had savings, a supportive partner, and the financial cushion to take this risk.

Fall 2020: Preparing the soil

The seeds of this career shift began with a move from San Francisco to Boise when I inherited a biodiverse garden that needed plenty of tending. The local gardeners specializing in perennial and drought-tolerant gardens were booked out a year in advance, so I started learning myself.

Early 2023: Taking Root

After stepping away from Elpha, I began volunteering at the Idaho Botanical Garden and was pointed toward Draggin' Wing, a native plant nursery.

Spring / Summer / Fall 2023: First Blooms

I joined Draggin' Wing to propagate and sell plants. Draggin' Wing is run by an incredible woman who has taught me so much about growing plants as well as pacing yourself to do the work long-term.

I started No Sweat Gardening that summer, offering garden clean-ups and native/pollinator plantings.

Instagram stories in Fall 2023.

Winter 2023 / Early 2024: Dormancy feels weird

This was my first winter as a gardener in a place without a winter growing season.

Unsure about how to spend this time and feeling the tightened income, I returned to what I knew and joined a startup full-time. They had a structured probationary period where both sides could decide to move forward or walk away after the first three months.

I thought perhaps what I had described as a change was really just a career break. I had taken some time away and could return to People Ops and startups refreshed and renewed.

Oops.

While the team was lovely and the benefits generous, my body quickly sent clear signals. The familiar tension in my shoulders and the racing thoughts at 3 AM returned. The environment was supportive, but I had evolved to need different conditions. The warning signs of burnout were whispering, and I’d gotten better at hearing them.

After the 3-month probationary period, I decided to step back into the garden.

Spring/Summer/Fall 2024: Growing Season

I ran it back in 2024, continuing to work at Draggin' Wing and connecting with Boise gardeners via No Sweat. My roots were deepening, and the work was beginning to feel like more than a burnout recovery.

Winter 2024 / Early 2025: Another transplant

There are a lot of I's, me's, and my's in the timeline above, but I'm lucky to be a 'we.’

My partner, Eric, was a thoughtful listener and compass through these changes. When I'd start drifting toward familiar tech shores out of financial anxiety or identity confusion, he'd reflect back the clarity I'd expressed on my best days.

He had been able to work remotely earlier in the pandemic, but his career is in San Francisco. Following a job offer in San Francisco for Eric, we decided to move back.

What would moving back to a place I associate with my tech career mean for my newfound path? More on that below. 👇

Growing Pains: Reflections on Change

When I look at my transition through my gardener lens, I see parallels to transplant shock. Even when moving a plant to better conditions, it often experiences a period of stress before establishing new roots and thriving. The same happens with career changes—even positive ones.

Navigating an identity change takes time.

My change hasn’t just been swapping out the ‘Work’ variable of a Work/Life equation.

It has meant adding more variables to that equation:

• Community

• Relationships

• Mental Health

• Physical Health

• Financial Health

I’ve come to think of these 5 variables as a portfolio, if you will. It can and should be rebalanced as your needs change.

At the time of my career change, I needed to dedicate more time to my mental and physical health. I also had more time to give to my community and relationships.

Following the move back to San Francisco, I completed a 3-month program with Garden for the Environment described as ‘a community-building course that uses gardening as the medium’. I volunteer in Golden Gate Park, weeding and planting around an area where I walk my dog, Wally, almost daily.

And, now, I’m ready to rebalance this portfolio again (you may notice the financial health piece could use some love).

I’ve been interviewing for public and private gardener jobs in SF, exploring freelance writing, and churning on some ideas about how my past and current careers might actually be ready to meet.

I’m starting to imagine a future where storytelling, nature, and work culture intersect—and I’m following that thread to see where it leads.

Welcome to Quite Contrary

If you're one of the wonderful subscribers who joined during my pay transparency days when this newsletter was List the Damn Salary Range, you might be wondering about the name change.

Going forward, this newsletter will explore the intersection of career design and environmental wisdom. I'll draw parallels between what I'm learning in the garden and what it tells us about work, productivity, and growth. I'll share stories about finding your "right place" professionally and personally and adapting to changing conditions.

Whether you're considering a career shift, recovering from burnout, or simply curious about more intentional approaches to work, I'd love to have you join me.

Growing Together: Your Turn

As I continue to figure out my next steps, I'm curious about yours.

What change or shift has been lingering in the back of your mind? What areas would you like to dedicate more time?

Share in the comments, or if you prefer, reflect privately. I'm also available for one-on-one conversations about navigating career transitions. Just reply to this email if you'd like to connect.

Thank you for being here.

~ Mary